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Wallow's Eve

by Nicholas Grooms

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1.
My Own Life 03:25
Ive got sharks trying to pull me to the deep end blood drenched, shipwrecked, dying of exposure cuing up my panic attacks, icy hot for this pain in my back blades sinking, time for change, got me thinkin its a dagger and they bury it deep, like six feet split the dirt, no hatchets underneath got wreaths made of poison ivy leaves and poison berries a virgin to this caring shit, time to bust your cherry time to carry more, put this world up on my shoulders remember when my niece was so little I could hold her gather my composure, wipe away the tears gotta make another album not a single person hears got some wrinkles up in time that I need to iron out you gotta mouthful of your problems that you wanna talk about I aint listening no more, you aint really needing my advice you just want me to agree with every point you think is right, well--- Ive got my own life and sins to atone I admit I bitch button my phone like "fuckin leave me alone" I'll stay silent cuz silence is gold one sided storyteller, man your story is old Ive got my own grief and people to lose Ive got my own inner child in his terrible twos sing the blues I'll stay silent cuz silence is gold one sided storyteller, man your story is old Left hand full of liberals, right hand full of generals heartful of your bigotry so ignorantly handled this body's just a vessel like a rented tux I comb my hair and give a fuck like "damn dude, looking like a million bucks.. you clean up nice!" Thats a compliment that hardly will suffice gonna rock your world like Aesop when his days turned into nights when I kickstarted my shit I heard your judgement dropped your gavel Seems like afterwards our friendship has unraveled keep it passionate without a fashion sense dressing for the occasion a passifist steady turning super sayaiin Im trunks, vegeta, goku, all these characters I go through a Kamehameha blast into your evil overcast finished last as a nice guy like "nice try, good effort" forward motion paragraph typesetter put the poetry in motion just to keep you pressing play now im proudly adding asshole to my fucking resume
2.
Wiped away my tears and I sipped a little coffee waiting in a chair like the universe forgot me wearing khaki slacks, ironed shirt get it off me... pictures of my dad and aunt Connie way back in the day now their telling old stories bout the barn they used to play in pain, give it time this too shall pass away how you died is now a story everybody has me tell part my lips just to speak my living hell feeling like a shell, just a turtle on vacation' my misplaced anger, used to send me to the basement wanted to be stronger like you so together like you want to weather every storm for the better like you deep down, such a sensitive soul cried with you on the phone just a month ago guess you had to go I wanted you to know that im looking for your signs I'll resurrect your spirit every single time I rhyme Black and white brownie cam photos scrapbooks full of stories and our relatives that wrote em circa better times, breathing air before pollution cub scout to eagle, let me show you how to do this tied a perfect not in the noose then left me hanging Im going through these motions not welcoming the changes I dont believe in angels or a man that creates em and man thats gives you spirit lets you hear it then he breaks it breaks it like my paper heart torn into confetti chasing hope so often all these people call me Chevy broken is the levy on the wall of this goddamn Nottingham sheriff slaying peasants kill this black lamb understand the algreba, aftermathmatician Blair witch logo in the trees fear the symbolism everything resembles something photographs youve taken the devils in the details level the foundation your house is on fire... People got me tripping out again saying "sorry bout your father" and "ill pray for you again" im at a loss for words like comfort is a term I don't deserve got me striking out again caught me swinging at the curves on my nerves, all these people in my business exorcise the demons in my head, mental fitness to hell with my persistence wipe my fucking world out of existence like everything I built youve killed in minutes divine intervention, spine broken brain you've apprehended cursing til my swears are left amended bleep em out and censor every damn thing im feeling picking scar tissue to the point im never healing "Grooms' never die" didnt see the warning signs like our Grooms family videos I yearn to press rewind watching it unfold, back when the future was unknown singing "Happy birthday dad!" this is 1990's ghost
3.
4.
Sleepwalkers 03:09
5.
Cold Front 03:12

about

On March 23rd, 2018 my life changed forever. My father and my aunt (his sister) both passed away within an hour of one another. Both of them were strong pillars in my life and like nothing, they crumbled and fell. "Wallow's Eve" is a collection of tracks I wrote following these tragic events to keep myself sane. I wrote it in bits and pieces, mostly on nights I was alone with my thoughts in between the tears and anger as I wondered if my grief would ever let up.

These songs are my favorites of the 15or so I had been working on between march and june and covered subjects ranging from grief, friends who only show up when they need something, my anxiety, the long early A.M. walks I spent in thought, the friends that have always been there, my anger, sadness and most of all the thought of knowing that my father and aunt would want me to forge ahead.

"Wallow's Eve" may not be the best EP ever written but hold a special place in heart for how it has helped me continue forward and create something good out of the worst situation I could ever imagine.

credits

released September 4, 2018

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Nicholas Grooms Kansas

That big dude in dickies and a 59-50.

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